College Essay Help ! Please review and give me a feedback ! Any sentence stracture, grammer issues etc. Thanks

Question:Due to size limitation, I'm putting a link to the essay below.

http://www.geocities.com/hsmith490/...

I would greatly appreciate if you can review and let me know if there are any ambiguity, sentence stracture or any grammatical errors in the essay or anything else that would make it better. I'm applying as a transfer student. (I've already completed my AAS degree and going for my BS).

I want to thank you in advance for your time and corporation.

thanks again !

Answers:
seminers? seminar..
The alumi to whom I spoke said they felt completely at home on campus.
How about this sentence?
Are you referring to alumni?

Great work..read it to someone and you might have idea which grammar still needs to be changed..\Sorry, I have time limit..

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WOW! I have IQ 161 and I couldn't do that. No errors. Great essay.

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