How to put quotes in my essay? help - english!?

Question:Both poems I have studied cover the topic of the first world war. However, they are very different in tone and emphasis. Harold Begbie’s poem “Fall In” shows how he believes going to war is important:
“It is naught to you if your country fall, and right is smashed by wrong?”
He uses persuasive arguments in each stanza to manipulate the reader into believing one should be proud to join the army and what happens if you do not. Siegfried Sassoon thinks very differently. He uses emotive, passionate language:
“You smug faced crowds”
Which suggests he believes people should be aware of the reality of the horror of the war.


Am i able to put the quotes into my paragraph like i have, with it still making sense ?
Thanks.

Answers:
The first quote is well embedded, I might change the second a little, though. I think you need more information. For instance, who is he referring to when he says "crowds"? The army? The people of the country? It might read more smoothly if you include that information. I.e.--

He uses emotive, passionate language when referring to the people of his country as "smug faced cowards". This suggests he believes that people...

Aside from the quotations, I think that you should expand more on your points. Your use of terminology (tone, emphasis, persuasive arguments, emotive, passionate) is excellent--but unless you elaborate more on each of your points, your paper will not be as strong as it has the potential to be. You sound as though you know what you're talking about--the next step is to organize and elaborate.

In your introduction, you state that the two poems differ in tone and emphasis--take your time to pove each of those points. I don't know how long or detailed this is intended to be, but in your shoes I would separate your paper into a section about tone and a section about emphasis. In each section, analyze the individual poems and show the differences between them. You sound as though you have the knowledge to easily separate your paper in this manner. Keep up the good work--I bet that your paper is going to be awesome. :o)
I think you did it just fine in your question. I would not suggest tinkering with it just do as you already have.

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