Answers:
awesome poem. i love it!
Sounds like it embodies the social theme of high school.
Pretty good.
Work on format and presentation.
If you're going to make a poem rhyme, you should stick with the same number of beats per line.
I didn't mean to make that rhyme. :)
It COULD be, but freeform poetry is best left to experienced writers. Why don't you try to rewrite this, using the same theme, but trying to be grammatically correct in your presentation?
I think you have a good idea, but it is just too hard to follow as you have written it.
It's good.
YEA ITS 0K
I really liked it!
I think you have a true talent! thanks for sharing!
hope you inspire others to write and infuse their writing with faith.
very beautiful! keep it up! :)
You've got a great poem going. You need to work on the fluency a bit. The voice is good, but can be improved. Go back through the poem and change words that are repeated too often, such as "once" (you use that word very often) and "finally." Format your poem, unless you prefer a paragraph format...Stanzas would make it easier for most people to read. Last, try to close the poem with a sentence/phrase that ties back to the opening sentence/phrase. Let me know how it ends up!
God Bless.
Pinkprairiestorm
it's more of a short hopeless romantic letter that happens to rhyme somehow than a poem honey.
its pretty good a bit hard to follow some times. go through it and if u find it a bit hard to understand yourself than others will to. good on you for writing it though!
it's ok n it sounds real
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